Anyone...? Anyone...?

Maybe its the people?

>Maybe its the culture?

The music...?

Maybe it represents some sub-consious disfunctional relationship dynamic...

Maybe I havent been cured of my romantic ideals yet... <

The answer is : Yes, it's all those things...

(this might be a bit long, but I'm reminiscing)

From what I have observed (from myself and aquaintances over the years),Cuba presents a certain facade (though not fake, as it is born in part from necessity) that does appeal to certain ideals. I think what we as tourists tend to "fall" for is the Cuban charm that comes from "they work with what they've got". In other words, it is an admiration and longing for a behaviour (for lack of a better word, and I really need help here) of creativeness. IMO, we (north americans and Euros etc.) are so used to having everything fabricated and supplied on demand that everything seems a bit contrived, even boring, doesn't it? Even romance.
I suspect that our ideas of romance have become tarnished and viewed as just a by-product of advertising. Inventiveness equals excitement somehow, it personalizes things. At least to me it does, as in "wow, he worked on that for me" or "he thought of "me" when he did that...".

I remember talking with a couple from France and we were discussing something we had seen, and I remember the man
saying "ca c'est le "genie" Cubain!" - "that is the Cuban "genius"!" - he was commenting on the resilience of a "peuple" : a "people". "People who fight to survive - "people" who prevail, people who "work with what they've got". His was not a patronizing view, it was one of enthusiasm and surprise. (but then the French can be like that :-) - (I can say that cos' I'm half)



-Back to the "romance" observation: (it is mine)

Now for a Cuban, who doesn't have a lot of material things to offer, he/she can make up for it with words. As I always say, I've never met a Cuban who doesn't like to talk (or sing for that matter, even if it's bad (and I've not met many of those). Actually I have met the one who doesn't talk, but I figure it's because he doesn't feel as comfortable in French (his second language) as he does in Spanish. I've seen the guy among his friends, and sure enough, he's talking up a storm. But I digress.

Women (in general) , love to be romanced, a big part of that is what they "hear" from a man rather than what they "get". It explains why so many women fall in love with Cuban men when they go on vacation. The men have "time" for them, and they talk to them, they make women feel special. I explained to a Cuban friend who worked in hotels before coming here and got to "know" a lot of women, that the reason "we" women get hooked on them, is that we get so much attention when we go there, that when we come back home, we feel invisible! (it takes time and experience to learn (and adjust) that it is not so bad here) By the same token, Cuban women have the same effect on the male tourists, they have "time" for them, they are very affectionate, and pretty and "coquette", they are not "difficult" to please (as I've been told on my travels) . (Incidentally, many Cuban men are really hot! as well, (pat, pat, pat, my forehead (just thought I would acknowledge that). Ultimately, I think that these ideals that we have, are a reflection of what everyone kind of longs for, but feels caught up in some sort of vortex that they can't get out of. Everyone seems to know it but doesn't know how to fix it. I think that part of Cuba's appeal to the visitor, (yet to the detriment of it's citizens) is that it has stopped in time, and it gives "one" time to breathe, and just "time" period. This extra "time" that people have affords them the luxury of more human interaction, something that we all crave. I think it also alludes to a perception of a more "innocent" time. When one sees the old cars from the 50"s, suddenly we are thrown back in time and it can conjure up a lot of "ideals". Perhaps I'm wrong, I'm basing this on observation rather than fact, but I sure seem to get the same feedback from people who return from Cuba and have totally fallen in love with the place. Yet they have this feeling of ambivalence due to feelings of guilt or "guilty pleasure". Aside from that, the music *is* great!, if you venture outside your hotel. And the people *are* friendly and warm!

I mean like anywhere, you can meet "creeps" or "super nice" people, you have to use your judgement. It drives me crazy, when I see "stupid" tourists who just go nuts and proclaim "Cuba is really safe!" and on this basis, start flaunting what they've got, and take major chances. You don't go throwing temptation out there! It lacks class and sensitivity. It's easy to feel like a big shot when you flash your dollars in front of people who have less than you. But I laugh when I see that, because I know that some of these guys that work in the hotels have more money than you *suckers*!

I used to get really embarassed at some of the ways people from my country acted when they were on vacation, and a friend of mine even confronted some vacationers in the middle of the night and made them feel ashamed for their behaviour. Like me, she was afraid it only reinforced this vision that the Cubans had of us "capitalists" - but I've come to realize that like me who works in a hospital, the people in the hotel trade have also have "seen it all!" Human behaviour is just what it is. Sometimes good sometimes bad. ( I still cringe sometimes though, but that's another rant).

So, the answer to the original question is the same as how I started, you love Cuba for all those reasons. At first it's the complexity and it makes you look at it from all sorts of angles, and then you just embrace it. I think you have to go many times and let it seep into your skin, and each time you come away with a new view, a new understanding. Cuba is never boring. I used to cry or feel depressed every time I came back from Cuba, because there was a longing that I had to stay there,and that was even whether I met someone romantically or not. I have witnessed this in many other people. I have learned to keep a sort of distance (to not get my heart broken) but still maintain an enthusiasm every time I go there, and I still come back with a bit of nostalgia for the place. There is no place like it in the world.